I'm close to tears... RIP bvasgm

15357

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Well I'll be damned. Christ.

I remember him, vaguely, but still, I remember him.

RIP.
 

Mellish

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I didn't know him since I'm a newbie, but such a young age to die. Damn. RIP
 

YROC

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Just incase anything "bad" happens in the future...

I love you guys.
 

Acepilotf14

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I did not know thee, but farewell, you're on to a brave new world!
 

dream431ca

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I haven't posted here for a long time, but I still remember the name. I'm not a crazy religious person, but I am Christian. I remember 2 years ago, when a friend of mine died because of an ATV accident. It was one of the most hardest things to go through in my life. I know what it feels like to lose someone you knew, and no matter how many times it happens in life, you never get used to it. But I take comfort in believing that I will see my friends and loved ones again when my time is over, whenever that comes.

RIP Bvasgm, you left this strange world tragically and before your time, but you will always live on in our hearts and minds, but as your physical body lies on earth, I feel that you are truly alive, among your ancestors and your past relatives.
 

Direwolf

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Oh man, I was in on the BF2 days, present in that 256 vs HL2 match, and even had some small participation in a few of the video attempts. I remember bvasgm distinctly, and it turns out he lived less than an hour from me and went to one of the schools I applied to. Under slightly different circumstances it would have been likely that I knew him outside of HL2.net

Godspeed.
 

nurizeko

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Never knew him, the name isn't familiar, I have never had any interaction with him, or so much as a flame, he is a complete nobody to me.



As such while I really cant say I personally am overly effected by this news (just another pointless road accident to me) its good to see he is well remembered and fully mourned by his friends.



We should all be as lucky.

RIP stranger guy.
 

Sparta

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Wow, i remember him. I could have sworn I played a game of the BF2 demo with him and Jimbo118 that consisted largely of jumping off that crane into a helicopter and then back out onto the crane. That was awesome.

That's terrible. R.I.P. man
 

Whitlo

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First off, I apologize if I've done something I'm not allowed to do. I only joined so I could post to this thread, and talk to you guys a little bit - I've not actually played HL2 or anything like that (Even though it looks pretty interesting~).

Secondly, I would really appreciate it if you didn't mention me contacting you on Nick's Facebook. I'm pretty sure I'm not allowed to do this, but I figured you guys had the right to know a little more about bvasgm.

So... Nick - "bvasgm" - was my cousin. I found this forum by googling the screen name you guys had mentioned on his Facebook. I'll tell you right off that I didn't know him very well. I know bits and pieces of his past, but bvasgm was a very private person, and there were a lot of aspects about him that I'd never known - like having internet friends, for instance. Honestly? I'm pleasantly surprised about this. Reading through some of your comments... I know it's been half a year since he died, but it's still very fresh for me, and I don't think it's something I'll ever really get over. All of you are honorable people.... Writing these kind words just for the sake of caring, and not really thinking anyone from the family would come by and read it. Thank you. All of you.

Now, I know someone mentioned wanting to do something to help out the family, send your condolences, and all that. I don't know about the "family" in general, but... For me personally... I didn't really know my cousin as well as I would have liked, and. Well. The most generous thing you could ever do for me would be to just... tell me about him. What you guys did. How good he was at this game. What kind of a person he was. I don't care what anyone says or thinks: Internet friends can be closer than real-life people, in a lot of cases, despite distance, and the fact you may have never met in person. So I value all of you who cared about bvasgm, Nick.

For those of you who care to read, I can tell you a little of what I know about him:

I'm Nick's cousin from Tennessee. He moved around a lot - I think he lived in New Orleans, then Minnesota, then Connecticut, since I've been alive - but he would come here every summer to spend a week or two and visit. This is why I say I didn't know him very well. I saw him a couple weeks out of the year, mostly. We visited him a few times - once in Minnesota, and the other time in Connecticut. He was into action movies, played paintball with his friends... after he died, I found out he was learning the guitar (I'm a musician, so this really surprised me). He was very opinionated, and we debated a lot about religion and stuff, but he was level-headed and always let me have my say before attacking in his own strategic way. He intimidated me when I was younger, because he has a very... potent presence. Very strong. And the last time I saw him, I had grown stronger myself, and I think we bonded the most that year.

He also drove down from Connecticut with a bunch of friends to see some big concert in North Carolina (I think) last summer. He stayed at my grandma's house in passing, but I didn't wake up early enough to see him before he was off again.

When he died, his mom opened up his room to all his friends. We found a lot of really interesting things. He had a day calender, the kind where you rip off a page to get to the next day beneath, and you can write notes on it. ... He had several years worth of notes written. Some were about basic things, like tests and stuff. Others were more personal. His last note, the day before he died, mentioned how he had had the best summer of his entire life this year. That things were fantastic, and (I'm shaky on specifics, don't quote me on this) that he could die happy, because life was so good.

I don't want to sound depressing. I love remembering our good times together, and even when I'm sad sometimes, and I think back on him fondly and am glad for the memories. If I had known about you guys, trust me, I would have made it my mission to let you know beforehand. I'm sorry you had to wait months before even hearing about this - I know some of you might have been worried.

But, ranting aside, I'm glad for everything you have said. I want to talk to you more, to know more about my cousin and the kind of man he was. Because, from what I've seen so far, I think just knowing him a little better would help me understand what's going on in my own life, you know?

(His birthday is April 12th, 1990, by the way. He's a year older than me.)

Thanks everyone.

-Whit
 

Raziaar

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Hello Whit.

I don't really know how to respond to specifics of your post, but I really want to say that I appreciate you coming here and posting what you have. It means a lot to me, as I am sure it does to others here as well.

I have also been paying attention to his birthday date, because I do want us to set aside some time to celebrate his birthday, as it is pretty typical fashion for us to do that to members around here. I see here you say it was the 12th, which is more accurate than I think it was in his profile, a couple days later than that.

Once again, thank you.


Oh and By the way, Whit, if you come back to this thread and see no replies yet other than my own, just understand that it'll typically take a while before most people come back and check this thread again and post a response. So while that shouldn't discourage you from coming back to check the thread again, you may want to wait some time before doing so if you expect to have a few responses to read.
 
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i certainly appreciate what you have done whit and all of us who didnt know your cousin no doubt want to hear what a special person he was as well.
 

Nomad

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R.I.P bvgasm. with all the sadness in my heart, i type this sentence.

i never really got to know bvgasm, or heard of him before, but it always, always gives me grief to know that a fellow member shuffles off the mortal coil. looking back at his posts, he seemed like a very intelligent and knowledgable person. Anyone on this forum who dies is like having something pierce me in the chest. I hope that he goes to heaven.
 

Sledgehammer

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Happy in death is so much better than sad in life.

That is all.

It seems to me that everyone walks out of this situation stronger than they were when they entered. Even if this thread is a sad one, yet it expresses so much strong belief in life, and all the good things about it. Even if he may have had a lifetime of adventures ahead of him, waiting to be claimed, it certainly sounds like he died a happy man. And if there's anything to desire, that must be it. While I may be sad now, I also have renewed belief in life. Everything dies, you might as well die happy. Now the relatives, be it us, his family or his friends, be able to overcome the loss. It's a challenge we walk into with much fear, and leave with much more strength gained.
 

Azner

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He was the one with the same Avatar as Nightshade for some time i remember.

Hope he will rest in peace.
 
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Holy christ.

I come back from a 2+ year hibernation and this is what I see??

RIP mate. We had some good times in BF2 with the rest of the HL2.net clan.

Thoughts are with his family as well.
 

Direwolf

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For the record, during the BF2 heyday the HL2.net clan as a whole kicked some serious butt. Good memories.

Anyone remember the result of that match against 256?
 

Shakermaker

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Won 1 round, lost the 2nd iirc. I recorded the game but it doesn't work with the current patch I believe.
 
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Jesus, I totally forgot about some PM's we had.

bvasgm said:
-Viper- said:
Oh, and bvasgm, curse you for using the same pic for your avatar. For a few months, I had a lambda logo that was completely unique!
This better? It's still the same pic. but permanently in negative avatar form.
bvasgm said:
-Viper- said:
Aw man it's ok. I was just being sarcastic. You can use it if you want. I was just being anal. :p

Besides, it's about time I changed mine.

Up to you.
Thanks...but this avatar's yours, you were using it first. I copied yours when I was at 100 posts..I'm at about 400 now and I think it's time I got my own original one. Thanks again, but it just wouldn't feel right to keep using this one. :)
bvasgm said:
Sorry about the hypocrisy, I know I said I was going to change it but finding a new avatar is slightly harder than I first thought. Soon as I find a decent replacament I'll change change it.

A little trivial, I know, but it's weird that I vaguely remember this conversation, but didn't put the two together. This was 5 months after he joined, so we were both very noob-bashful.

Also, that was a good and warm-felt post Whit. I don't think I can say much specifically about him. We talked maybe two or three times in chat. Mostly what I remember was playing in BF2. Generally that whole couple of months with everyone in BF2 was some of the best multiplayer/online experience I've had, and I'm sure it was for him to.
 

VirusType2

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That sucks. He was active when I was new and I remember him well. I also remember him leaving a long time ago.

I was hoping to visit his profile here to read the comments, but it seems the members list has been disabled at the moment.
 

ríomhaire

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I'm adding my respects.

R.I.P. bvasgm

I was more sad to read about this than the death of one of the students in my college who I never knew.

I love you all.
 

hool10

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Yeah I remember bvasgm from the BF2 days as well. He was the member who I would remember had that name of "bovine gasm". ;( He was so young too.
 

Jangle

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Crap, I've just seen this thread. This is so sad.. Coming out of hiding to pay my respects

R.I.P Bvagasm
 

WhatsHisFace

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This is really weird... I go to Rutgers, and I was going to Rutgers at the time this happened... but I didn't know this until now. I'm really sorry to hear about this, but I'm also unnerved that my school wouldn't tell us about another student's death.

In fact, we had a suicide around the same time this happened, and a teacher died around Christmas. They never told us a thing. That's pretty strange to me.
 
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